Eight legged freaks

For starters, have you seen this movie?

It is the most horrifying movie after arachnophobia, that I have ever seen.

That's right, folks! I'm terrified of spiders....

ANYWHO: We have finished our move to the new house. It has been vacant for a few years and we had to do some painting and other small things to get settled in.

Okay...by "small" I actually meant that we had to do some crazy things that I would have never even thought of.

Right! Back to the spiders. So, as previously stated, I'm terrified of them. To the point of having bad dreams and not sleeping for the night because I had seen one within a hundred feet of my room. Childish? Maybe. I don't care though because I'd rather be laughed at than pretend that I didn't just get the heebie jeebies from hearing it and feeling it squish under my fingers as I'm trying to get rid of it.

*Disclaimer: I do not squish spiders if they are outside. I'm a firm believer that if I want them to stay out of my house then I'll leave them alone in theirs.*

With this house having been vacant for so long, there has been complete free reign of spiders around here for quite some time. We got all of the visible ones out of corners and windows and such but there is no way to completely get rid of them all for a while.

I've only seen small little, black, hairy ones up to this point so I'm not really that worried about it.

Until tonight....

I'm walking barefoot into my new bathroom that I'm finally able to use since everything has been fixed. I'm excited and carrying a box full of shampoo, conditioner, and other necessary items required for proper shower taking and naturally not expecting that I'm secretly walking right passed spiderzilla on my way to and from.

Did I mention that I'm barefoot?

So I finally get all my things in the bathroom and I'm ready to shower off all the moving dust and grime. *click* light is on and I'm singing to myself about the happiness of showers completely oblivious to the demon that is staring right at my toes.

I feel a slight tickle and look down to see IT. A 50 cent piece sized red and black, transparent, skinny, creepy, agent of death.

Yeah, hell yeah, I screamed!!!

In the process of trying to locate my brother, put something over the spider to hinder his attempt to escape, and get as far away as humanly possible from this monster, I have fallen and hit my knee.

This should only serve as proof that they are out to get you.

Here I sit at 4:30 in the morning telling you my story of near death because.....can you guess why?

YEP!! All I can think about is them crawling all over me. My hair touches my neck and I'm wide awake and across the room ready to strike.

Hope you all can sleep a little better. :-* 

Me

It’s been a while since I’ve been here. I let life sweep me away for a while. That’s the best excuse I could come up with I suppose. 

The truth is that I have been doing some self reflecting and self transformation over the past month or so. 

There are a lot of people that I let forget how much they mean to me and I let myself forget who I am in the midst of all the stress and things pulling me down.

Good news?

I’m working on getting myself back. That’s the girl that I’ve been missing for quite a while and I’m glad she’s back. At the same time, I’ve lost time that I’ll never get back. That’s done now and I’m not going to dwell on what I can’t fix and worry about changing the things that I can.

I haven’t been the person I should have been all this time and I’ve taken people and the things in my life for granted.

I’ve been told that before by other people but I suppose I’m too stubborn to actually listen to them. It took a rude awakening to shake me into seeing the truth for what it was. It turns out that the reality was much more rugged than the lines that my rainbow color glasses had led me to believe.

The glasses are off now and I’m trying to smooth out the edges of this reality that I’ve created unknowingly (or maybe it was knowingly. I’m not really sure anymore) and take a new path. Where that path leads, I’m not really sure. I do know one thing it’s going to need to be cleared because I’ve made a mess out of it.

Fighting the urge to go back to my old ways and numb myself from the hard work it’s going to take to let everyone see the good person that lies behind my façade but I’m ready to show the world that I exist. Me. Not the girl that I THOUGHT everyone would want to see or the girl that I thought 

everyone wanted me to be.

Just me.

I figure that if I’m real, I’ll find real people to surround myself with. Maybe then, no, ONLY then will I be able to truly find happiness.

Life is filled with superficial encounters. Those turn into relationships. Relationships are based off of communication.

Sometimes that communication is all a lie.

SURPRISE!

I haven’t been true to myself. Therefore I haven’t been true to those around me. Luckily some people saw that and loved me anyway.

Those are the people that I want to show the real me to.

They deserve it.

I deserve it.

It’s time.

Hello world, I’m Kristy! Take it or leave it but you get what you see from now on.